By M.M. Johann of The Tenets of Unbiblical Patriarchy. Originally posted here. This is part of a new series critiquing Vision Forum’s Tenets of Biblical Patriarchy. Please remember that while the contributors to this website are united in our belief that there are problems with the teachings of Vision Forum, we come from a variety of diverse perspectives.
6. A man’s authority in the home should be exercised with gentleness, grace, and love as a servant-leader, following the example of Jesus Christ. Leadership is a stewardship from God. (Ps. 103:13; Mal. 3:17; Matt. 11:29-30; Col. 3:21; 1 Pet. 3:7)
Ps. 103:13 – As a father pities his children, So the LORD pities those who fear Him.
Mal. 3:17 – “They shall be Mine,” says the LORD of hosts, “On the day that I make them My jewels. And I will spare them As a man spares his own son who serves him.”
Matt. 11:29-30 – “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
These verses are not tenets, but describe what God is like. Everyone, not just leaders or/ and married fathers, should follow Christ.
Col. 3:21 – Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
I Pet. 3:7 – Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
This tells to understand and honor her, not that you have authority over her. The word “vessel” is usually used in the Bible for the body or material things, and a weaker vessel probably refer to either physical strength, or that at a time when women often died in childbirth, they were weaker in health.
6a) A man’s authority in the home
TBP have not yet shown from scripture that men have authority that women do not.
b) should be exercised with gentleness, grace, and love as a servant-leader,
Yes, that is how to lead. The problem is when Patriarchy teaches men should lead in areas where the Bible does not prove they should. However gently a man lead where his leadership does not belong, it still is usurping the freedom of another.
c) following the example of Jesus Christ.
Yes. A verse for that will enhance TBP.
d) Leadership is a stewardship from God.
Once again, TBP give no verse for it. Some leadership is stewardship, but wrongly usurped leadership is theft.
Other ways Christians understand this:
Many Christians would not use the term “authority in the home” for an admonition to bring your children up in the faith, something which your wife and your church (and perhaps others) could also participate in. And it is common to believe that wrongly seized leadership is not stewardship.
Summing it up
How reliable is this tenet? I will use a color code:
The color code:
This is adequately Biblically defended
This is defended biblically, but another view could also be defended biblically
This is not Biblically Defended This can be defended Biblically, but TBP don’t give such a verse
6. A man’s authority in the home should be exercised with gentleness, grace, and love as a servant-leader,
following the example of Jesus Christ. Leadership is a stewardship from God.